Laughter and the Perils of Life

Happy Niece
Originally uploaded by makelessnoise.

A number of years ago I spent a month alone in Denver taking a university course. One evening I found myself on Larimer Square, a trendy shopping and nightlife area. I bought a ticket to an "artsy" movie playing in a small theater. I had never heard of the film but the premise on the movie poster intrigued me. Harold and Maude, it said, is the story of a young man and an old woman who meet and fall in love at the funeral of someone neither of them knew. Okay, maybe that premise wouldn't appeal to you. My sense of humor is a bit quirky. I admit it.

Rarely have I laughed so hard. Jammed into a packed theater, alone in the crowd, I was caught up in the spirit of the time and place. I loved the movie and I loved even more the shared laughter with this community of strangers assembled for this one moment in time.

Several years later I saw that the film was playing on late-night television (no VCRs or DVDs in those days). I imposed upon my wife to stay up and watch this hilarious movie. She did so, up until a point about halfway through when she dozed off for the night. I wasn't far behind. The movie, still a classic comedy, was a very different experience in the quiet of a house following the evening news.

Over the years I have thought a lot about humor, which is something I use in public speaking and in some of my writing. It is a very complicated subject. What is funny to one person is not the least bit funny to another. Something that is funny in one time or place may be just the opposite in a different setting.

Part of it is undoubtedly in technique and circumstance. But I think there is a more significant factor and that is the fine line between comedy and tragedy. Witness the number of comedians who have taken their own lives or lived out self-destructive lifestyles. Comedians tip-toe up to the edge of life and balance precariously on a line of absurdity, cynicism, deception, guilt, and shame. Not theirs alone, but something shared by all humanity.

The President has a new press secretary. He will need a deeply developed sense of humor to deflect the harsh realities of the issues he has to talk about every day. We won't always laugh at his jokes. Sometimes life is just too raw. But we do need to understand that even in these dangerous times laughter is an effort to hold back the darkness and lay claim to the light.

Even so, we must toe the line carefully so as not to step over it. There is great pain in telling a joke and having no one laugh. In that frozen moment we come to fully understand that humor can both hurt and heal. It celebrates that which is at the heart of community even while exposing that which splits it apart.

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